Doll accessories for the broke.

Collecting dolls can be expensive. Well, let's face it it is expensive. Even the smallest resin dolls coming in about £100, and that's without any of the extras such as clothes. So after scrimping and saving for months for your first doll it can be a little disheartening to see the prices of clothes and furniture. Granted there are many companies trying to bring down these prices and give collectors the best deal, but a full outfit can still cost you upwards of £40.

You can cut costs by making things yourself, finding free patterns all over the internet, using old clothes for fabric but for those without such skills there are other options.
Finding other dolls that have the same proportions as your chosen doll and using clothes designed for them.

Yo-SD dolls will fit many fashion doll clothes such as barbie and Moxie teenz.
MSD or SD dolls will fit Best friends club doll clothes though these will be very short.

Just see what's out there.

Jewellery can be another thing that turns out to be more expensive. A great tip is to check out your own jewellery box for old necklaces, bracelets and general stuff that you don't wear any more. A pair of pliers can be your best friend.

These little accessories were made from the details of an old choker.  



For furniture you can create from scratch, trawl antique shops or modify other doll furniture. I prefer the latter.
Out of a doll cot I made a bed and sofa with a ladder for my smaller dolls. I also have a wooden doll wardrobe that holds a lot more than you'd think.

Doll ownership is fun, and so it should be, but it is expensive. Save where you can and you won't regret it. 

MLP FIM avi's

Frreeeeeeeeeeee. Take one, you know you want to.

Feeling vaguely poetic

Memories of a family split by happen-stance, warmth under the eyes of legion. Learning like a child, seeing the world anew. Repeating. Over.
Sitting in the arms of my lover, familiar energy coursing through the air. Peace.     

'sigh'

So close yet so far. I felt the sensation of flying the other day. I miss it already. It felt like freedom.
Sadly today I'm ill. Not sure what's caused it but here it is, making me nauseous and fuzzy headed. And my paranoia is acting up. Mostly towards my mother. She's trying to protect me from things I've known about for a while. I wish she would just trust me to protect myself these days instead of weakening me and poisoning me to keep me away from it all. She still sees me as a weak child with no concept of the truth. I'm getting to grips with who and what I am and I don't mind it.
Even if it turns out that I'm what many would call a monster I wouldn't mind. That is my past, not necessarily my future. Those who have bathed in blood may become clean by bathing in water.
And the shadows hold no fear for me now.  But for my mother I think she fears the doors she has opened and the paths she has walked. Maybe, like me, she had no choice. She just needs to accept who she is and move on. The light can live with the shadows. They don't need to be so separate.

Times have changed and will continue to change. I am what I am the same as everyone else.

Gah...

I guess this is a rant. I'm getting so frustrated with myself. With my body. I watch these people around me who eat more and exercise a hell of a lot less than me wearing size ten clothes and finding life so damn easy. For goodness sake I walk at very least three miles every day, I'm lifting heavy things all day and I eat less than 1500 calories a day and I'm still, STILL, a size 16. I don't know what else I can do.
I want to be able to run without feeling so heavy. I want to be strong. Why is it every time I run my asthma plays up? My legs hurt and I can barely stand?!  It's not fare. I just want to be normal ! To be healthy!
I just want to be able to go a day without some part of me aching. A night without having to take my inhaler. I have a good diet. I don't drink, I don't smoke, I eat my damn vegetables, so why does my body hate me?! 
Even my hormones can't chill out and let me be. I don't want to be hyper one minute and crying my eyes out the next.
And the worst part? I've been to the doctor, there's NOTHING physically wrong with me. If I knew I was sick then maybe it would make it better somehow. I could understand it. I could deal with it. But no, I'm an apparently perfectly healthy, stressed, exhausted, overweight twentyone year old woman.
It just makes me want to scream sometimes.

Spring time!

It's now well into spring and it's the prefect time to get creative. This post will be for the girls (sorry boys) as we cover makeup, clothes and jewellery.

It's the time of year when the world looks like this :

and everyone's a lot more relaxed. It's the perfect time to clean out your wardrobe and replace a few older items.

It's also a brilliant time to make something new.
Today I put a air clip together, inspired by those blossoms. Here it is:





Made with bead strings, elastic, a small bell, a few little earrings and a pretty pink flower. Easy to do just by tying it all together. No glue, no mess.











Your makeup can have a revamp too. Time to put the cold blues and deep reds of the winter in the draw and bring out the soft pinks.




To get a soft effect brush a light white eyeshadow all over then add a gentle pink over the lid. Add mascara and white eyeliner to make your eyes pop.










You can have a bit of fun with your nails too. Multi coloured nails aren't just for the little ones.

Have a go for your self. Keep the colours light, but not shocking.
















Finally, remember your sun safety. A wide brimmed hat this time of year is your best friend.

And get that sun cream on.

The weeboo Vs the fan.

There's a thin line between these two and if you don't know what a weeboo is then you'll work it out as we work through this handy dandy list.

Traits of a weeboo:

• Buying anime, just because it's anime.
• see above but for manga.
• Speaking in random broken Japanese for no reason whatsoever and with no real understanding of what they're actually saying (or "the desu rule").
• Dressing up as random characters they know little to nothing about at conventions.
• Dressing in ita lolita as they've not looked up lolita, only knowing that it's one of Japan's many street fashions.
• Screaming kawaiiiii at the top of their voices at anything remotely cute.
• Buying Japanese versions of games even if they can't play them.
• Blindly hating any media from any country other than Japan for no reason.
• Eating only noodles, sushi and pocky.

Ok, let's compare this to the traits of a fan:

• Buying anime of a certain genre because they are interested in that sort of thing.
• Once again see above but for manga. These people will often also often read many types of graphic novels and other books.
• Learning Japanese language and culture to better understand the media they enjoy or visit the country.
• Dress up as their favourite character at conventions.
• Buying their region versions of particular Japanese games they think they'll enjoy. 
• Enjoying varied media from all around the world.
• Eating a balanced diet and enjoying pocky as it tastes good.

Sewing post. Robe ^_^

Yes boys and girls, it's finally done. My new robe is all put together and toasty warm, perfect for English weather. It's fake fur so no bashing me.
I love how the sleeves came out and I even had enough fabric left to make some mittens. No freezing for me. I can't wait to use it, not sure what for yet but still.
I used a kimono sort of pattern as it was easiest to sew and really came out looking good. 

Fears, trials and tribulations.

I've gotten over a lot lately. A hell of a lot.
I'm on antidepressants now so I'm feeling much more steady and it's helping me get over some of my other issues.

Yesterday I got my tattoo, something I said I would never do due to my fear of needles. It was just for me, a drop of blood for something I've been wanting for years. It was every bit worth it.
I can go out and eat in restaurants without freaking out. I am more relaxed in my job and actually want to move up. I want to be a supervisor one day. I want to move on in my life. I need to.

Look at me, I'm becoming 'normal'.

Is it racism? Political corectness vs sense.

Is this racism if... Yes, nowadays we all ask ourselves that once in a while. Time to put a simple answer to it.
Probably not actually, but we're made to feel that way.
Let me give you an example:
Say I do not want to serve that specific middle eastern person in the que. On the face of it that would be racist, right? Ok, let's elaborate. Say said middle eastern person always kicks up a fuss and can get borderline abusive to whoever serves them. Would that still be racist ? Some would still say yes but I believe that's wrong. I do not see race, I never have. I see: human, nice person, utter twat, imposing person, cheery person.
You may ask what's brought this up. Well yesterday, all over facebook people were copy pasteing hatred against all Muslims because a tiny minority chose not to observe the two minutes silence. This, I'm sorry, definitely is racist. To pidgin hole an entire religious following because of the actions of a small few just is.
It ticks me off that due to the political climate people say it's ok to do that and hide behind so called 'britishness'. It's not British to be a racist bitch being one of the most multicultural islands in the world.

Maybe it's just the equalist in me but it seems very unfair. We still have a dictatorship in China (you know what? I'll come back to that later) but you don't see hate spread across a social networking site for that. People are starving, being tortured, and killed every day due to the actions of the few and we don't see that either. Maybe it makes us uncomfortable talking about true atrocities instead of childish crap that doesn't mean a thing in the long run.

Ok, I said I'd come back to the subject of China and I will.
I'll begin with this: China is not, by definition, communist. Just because they say they are does not mean it is true. Communism is a movement where everyone is equal: they have equal rights, equal monetary value, equal responsibility and equal say. Does this sound like China to you? No? Didn't think so.
You ask why I'm getting my panties in a twist about this, well I'm sick of the majority thinking that communism is an inherently evil thing. It's not, it's a wonderful thing it's just 90% of humans cannot do it due to greed. It's the whole Animal farm scenario.
Just remember, in true communism some animals are not more equal than others.

That's all I can say on politics really as our country doesn't have a , main three, party I'd care to ever vote for again. They're all liers and conmen.

Well there's me on politics and race, I'll get to sexism another time.
So, boys and girls, have you been racist lately? 

The importance of being pampered.

Yes boys and girls even I need a pamper day once in a while.
A hot shower, a pot full of fruit and nut scrub (not chocolate but it smells yummy, can be bought from Animal aid I think. Not a fan of the literature but I LOVE their products.), some rockstar soap (from Lush) and a ginger and lilly scented soy candle (from Hub). Only the best.
It all makes you feel refreshed and ready for the world, and ready for housework.

Let's face it, housework isn't fun in any way shape or form but having a little pamper session makes it all bearable. Plus it re-energises you when you really cannot be bothered with the world. And it's not just for the girls. Guys can enjoy a good scrub down too, in fact Lush carries loads of male orientated products for you guys that couldn't stand to use pink soap. You guys can get yourself a blue candle and some super manly shampoo and have a bit of 'me' time too. Don't say I don't think of you.

So off I go to change the bed and make dindins.
Love you all.

The art of conflict and healing.

We all want world peace... Right?

Well no actually. Humans cannot survive without some sort of conflict, they'd go insane without it. The intellectuals among us debate, we have no physical need to debate but something inside us draws us into these small conflicts. The not so intellectual types get into drunken fights on a Friday night, a not so healthy version of our debates. It is something innate that makes us need to support a team or group over all others, makes us choose a favourite colour and time of the day. It's frivolous but we need it.

So what would the world be like without conflict? Well, there would never be a war again - Great! But nothing would ever change, no one would ever question anything again- not so good. And our emotions would never be released- definitely not good.
We'd just become mindless drones that plodded along never doing anything out of the ordinary. Art and music would die out, we would not play games or perform a kind deed for the sake of itself. 

So, do I wish for world peace? No, I wish for world intelligence and debate. Then maybe we wouldn't get any more bullying or thuggery. Sadly I doubt that will happen any time soon.
I'll keep my need for conflict and revel in it, wearing what I like and choosing to support the causes I do. Will you?

Retail.

(Disclaimer: This is not a rant about my job itself. I like my job. I work with good people and it pays nicely. With that in mind, let's continue.)

As you may know I work in retail. Yes that job that almost everyone does at least once. You may also know, if you have ever worked in retail, that there are certain customers you wish just would not come back. Even we have those.

There's the old man in the wheelchair (That he seems not to need as he trots around it and pulls it along with his legs) hung with his entire life attached to strings. I have no problem with this but it's the first thing you recognise to identify him. He will mumble questions to you, then get very angry when you ask him politely to repeat himself so you can answer. He then uses the next ten minutes, in front of the till (or right next to it) , to hang his shopping bag on the back of his wheelchair, faff around with his strings and sit down, looking at everyone as if they've personally offended him.
I have no problem with the quirks people get in old age, that's fine, but the intentional rudeness just bothers me.

The second is a lad who comes in and hangs around the pick'n'mix, takes some, puts it in a cup, decants it into another cup, walks off, returns and decants it into another cup, fills up the cup, decants it again, walks away, puts a few in his pocket, puts a lid on the cup, walks off, picks it up again, decants it, eats some, closes the cup... lather, rinse, repeat. I'd say it was a psychological issue and you can't blame him for not understanding that taking sweets is stealing, but he won't do it if someone's around. He makes sure no one's looking, gets jumpy when the staff are around and makes sure he LOOKS as if he wants to legitimately buy. That takes a lot of thought and understanding and it drives me nuts because I know the bleeding hearts would scream if we asked him to leave.

Next is a general one. The types that will ask you to fetch items, price check items (That we can only do on a none logged in till), discount items (why should we?) all in the same transaction as the line grows longer and longer behind them.

It just makes life hard for everyone.

My next little complaint is about technology. The tills, oh sweet gods the tills. When they work they work well. When they work. When they don't they're slow, unresponsive, and sometimes simply crash. And all the while I have to apologise. And the scanners decide when, where and what they will scan. They could scan an item from across the room, but you try and scan a large bar code from an inch away and nothing.

Don't get me wrong, I love my job and 99.9% of customers are polite, nice, considerate people, but some things are just irritating. Thank goodness for decent, nice, staff.

So everyone, have you ever experienced an irritating customer, a pain in the butt checkout system or even a rude shop assistant?

LGBT apparently the cause of loose morals according to tv....

Honestly, finding a tv program that shows a realistic LGBT relationship is like finding a pig with wings. These broadcasters throw out another so called LGBT friendly storyline and expect us to eat it up, like we should be grateful for all of their 'hard work'.

Well, let's see about these so called storylines:
The characters are usually insane and/or so loose they'd be considered as whores if their lovers ever bought them lunch.
That or they're so full of angst that they go and kill themselves.

Yes, I know many LGBT people all over the world suffer discrimination and hardship but please, can we just once show a sane, educated, happy person in an LGBT relationship. PLEASE. Just once.

The closest thing we got was Ianto from Torchwood. He was an intelligent, attractive, bisexual lad that didn't run around sleeping with everything in sight (which was odd for Torchwood.) And guess what , he ended up getting killed off.

I'm just so sick and tired of how we're represented, and it's getting to a level that I find personally insulting. I'm not a beaten down depressed woman that will jump on any other woman as soon as I see them and do not want to be presented in that way.
I'm not usually one for speaking out as England tends to be pretty tolerant and I've had nothing but positive words for who I am, but come on British media.

Ok, rant over. Please comment and give your opinions.

The ex...

Boys and girls, we've all had it. You get together, you split up and the next time you meet is impossibly uncomfortable. Today I had that.

Let's start with a little history. I've only had two other relationships before my current one. The first was a secondary school romance that never really went beyond hand holding. That ended by text at a dungeons & dragons session. Yes it was that childish, but me and that ex are on good terms. We both know that we were just silly little kids and it just wasn't working out.

The second... well that was more complicated. She went to the same secondary school as me, a year above, and to college. We were good friends. She was the nervous, soft hearted, downtrodden girl and I was the smart, quiet nerd. It fitted.
I used to be quite unemotional so we decided to have an open relationship. I was mature enough to handle that... She was not.
After a while she started going out with my best friend. He lived near her while she was at uni so it was better. I was fine with that and here at home I developed a crush on my now wife. Everything was fine and dandy until I told her.

She said she was fine with it and I didn't feel like I was going to act on it so I thought everything was ok. I was wrong. Every time she got upset she would accuse me of cheating or hint at it (We were in an open relationship remember). After a large strop about a valentines card that she didn't think existed she dumped me, over text. She quoted the bible at me and said awful things and finally said it was over.

It doesn't end there. My friend is polygamous and had another girlfriend. Everything was going fine for them and I gave them my blessing, but my ex was having none of it. She would threaten him, attack him and psychologically wear him down. She even tried to knife him.
Finally even he snapped, separating from her with the help of his other girlfriend. We all realised my ex's problem. She didn't like you paying attention to anyone but her and I she couldn't have you to herself no one could. She was a dangerous woman and we were all glad to be free of her.

I haven't even mentioned how she split a close group of friends apart. Manipulating us all into hating each other. Even now we're not the close group we used to be and this is years later.

Well, today I saw her. I've avoided her before but today there she was. This woman who almost destroyed so many lives and tried to knife a friend.
She was quiet and meek, asking if me and my wife were still together (our wedding anniversary is this month) and trying to be friendly.
I wasn't rude or angry, but I do now know every detail of my boots, and was so glad when we could get on the bus and away from her. I showered when I got home.
I hold no ill will to her, I'm not like that. I hope she lives out the rest of her life happily, and that she never hurts another person like she did us. I just hope I never see her ever again.

So everyone, there it is, my story. I hope none of you ever go through something like that.
Next time you see one of your ex boyfriend's/girlfriend's think of this and hold no ill will, just walk away and know you'll never have to go through that again.

Tell me your stories.
   

Death or a salesghost...

Every few years it seems like Halloween is dying out, and then it comes back. The problem is it comes back weaker each time. I remember when I was a child, I'd look around the shop fronts and see pumpkins and ghosts everywhere. Now you're lucky if you see a few fake cobwebs. Everyone seems much more interested in Christmas tat.

Once again, I have nothing against christmas. I like christmas. I like gifts and food and family but for goodness sake it's October! I'd love to have a little recognition for Halloween which for me, and thousands of pagans, is an actual religious festival. And I know I'm going to get people screaming "Well Myo', wouldn't you prefer it to stay pure and not commercialised?"

Well, no actually. It's commercialised in America and at least it can celebrated well. Here in ye olde England, the home of many branches of paganism, it is simply forgotten, or presented in some half arsed "Let's put a black cat on a cupcake and call it a Halloween bun." sort of way.

I suppose I'm just a little disappointed. As a child I loved seeing all the displays and the joy all the spookyness brought with it, it got me ready for a damn good Samhain. Now... It's sort of lonely. I don't have that many actively pagan friends so my celebrations are always small but it was nice to see the spectacle of it all and feel like I wasn't so lost .

Well this is becoming a tad emo and it's not meant to be. I'm just frustrated and confused as I thought shops thrived on commercial fads and buying based festivals yet they do not cash in on the festival closest to Christmas in a month that's well known for being quiet on the shopping front. And what about the goth kids? I used to get half of my christmas prezzies at Halloween.  

So what do you think: Would you rather a commercial festival or a pure yet forgotten one? Or would you rather let it die out and leave a fond childhood memory?

All Hallows een

Hello guys and girls. Me again.
Yes, it's getting to that time of year again. Time for ghosties, ghoolies and kids in cheap masks begging for sweets. Ahh it is my favourite time of year. Not that I like kids in cheap masks begging for sweets particularly, in fact I'm one of those people who hides and doesn't answer the door to them.

Never the less it is my favourite time of year, with the leaves changing colour and the hot days petering out (finally). Plus it'll be the new cycle of the year ready to begin and I need a new start more than I need a hot dinner. Granted I say that every year but every time it's true. Luckily this year I've gone through quite a few revelations and changes that I think will put me in good stead.

Keeping this in mind I'm planning to do something this Samhain (that's Halloween to anyone who hasn't worked it out. Just saying.). In fact my costume's already made, it's a cream Roman costume that I just need to get the jewellery and sandals for. Granted not the best costume for late October, I'll be taking a so not historically accurate coat, but it does look great. Dressing up isn't the most religious practice but I find that mixing a little fun and faith keeps me interested. Why can't something you dedicate your life to enjoyable?

That's one of the reasons I don't get on with most mainstream religions. If I needed guilt thrust upon me I'd go to a diet club. No thank you. I'll keep to my song and celebration if you don't mind.

Anyway, I'm stayed far from the topic so back we go. Have a happy Halloween everyone, I know I'm going to try to. 

Cleansing: Mind, body and spirit.

Lately I've been clearing out my room. It was feeling stuffy and dusty, so I decided to make a dent in it. So two bin bags full of junk, a full vacuum and a bag full of cleaning wipes later it was looking much better. Feeling much better too (even though I was sneezing and coughing my way into an early night).
To finish it off today we bought some new curtains (a lovely deep purple) and mirrors for my wardrobe doors in the shape of butterflies.

Now it just needs time to settle in before Samhain (Halloween to anyone who isn't pagan or has never heard). I've never had chance to do this before a festival before as I've always had trouble with sorting. I'm a bit of a magpie and throwing things away just boggles my mind. As if it'll all be useful one day. Of course that's nonesence  but it doesn't stop me thinking it. Anyway, this year I'm finding everything a lot easier. I'm not clinging onto things as much and I'm feeling much better within myself in general. It helps that I'm getting back on my diet and detox. I'm feeling more active and awake again, though flushing the nasties from your system is not fun. I have a brighter and outlook on life and I'm a LOT more confident. The whole world doesn't seem as bad any-more.

Amazing what a clean out can do, isn't it? 

Picture posting , just this once.

This is my newest outfit. It's a two piece pinstripe suit with a pleather corset underneath. This is my first step into my new style. I hope it says good things about my future. It fit wonderfully (though it was tight, but when are corsets not?) and the jacket even needed to be pulled in which is a nice ego boost. As you can see I'm not the smallest girl and I've been trying really hard to diet. 1000kcal a day, lots of fruit and veg', trying to get all my vitamins and plenty of water. It's hard but I'm still going and hope to one day be a UK size 12. That's my goal (No crappy size 0 for me). It's been very hard and probably always will be as I hold weight terribly and have a naturally wide rib cage. Sucks huh?

Hope you're all having a good time of it in the moment. I hope to post again soon.

First freak out in a while, a personal record.

Yes everyone I used to have these little freak outs a lot. A lot! But lately, since Infest in fact, I've been pretty chilled out and zen about things. Taking life as it comes and knowing that with the right amount of work everything will be ok.
But it's the silliest things that get to you. For me it was charging my new mp3 player.

Let's get some history on this shall we. I've always had simple AA/AAA battery operated cheaper players. I've never been fussy, as long as it played music I was happy. Then technology developed and this wasn't good enough apparently. The world moved on without me and it all had to be built in and USB charged. I seriously dislike this idea as I'm well known for letting my player die half way through a 2 mile walk, that's why I always carry batteries. Of course you can't do that with a built in rechargeable battery. Now, I finally had to accept that I had to move with the times as my old player bit the proverbial dust. So I wanted something cute and special. Long story short, the battery in it would not charge no matter what I did. I wanted to send it back but in this current climate the company just wasn't safe. After weeks I got my money back but feeling thoroughly exasperated I developed a hatred and fear of these rechargeable things.

But here I am still without an mp3 of my own. I finally asked a good friend of mine for help. He's my tech' genius and I trust his word. So he found one that's great and in my price range. Brilliant, music finally. But my fear kicks in and he suggests a mains charger. Wonderful. That should work and is a lot more reliable than my silly lap top. So I wait for the charger and finally I can use my pretty little player.

I left it connected to the mains, as it were, all night... No charge. I leave it all day... No charge. And then the freak out hit. All the hassle of last time flooding back. In my attempt to crawl back from despair I hooked it up to my lap top to shove some music on it anyway. It told me it was charging.
"Suuuure you are. Just like last time." I sighed. Well, five hours later I unplug it as it tells me it is fully charged. And low and behold it was. End of freak out.

As I said, it's always the little things. Not my partner losing her job (Don't ask, long tearful explanations are not needed), not financial, social, or political instability, but an mp3 player.

So ladies and gentlemen, what little things make you panic?